- Have you ever blamed others for your problems?
- Do you ever procrastinate?
- Have you ever abuse excuses?
- Do you ever slough events off--not taking responsibilities for your
actions?
- Do you ever put time and energy into getting even with someone?
- Do you try to do everything perfectly?
- Do you try to do it all?
- Have you ever avoided doing something because you thought you might
fail at it?
- Have you ever been too loyal to something or someone?
- Have you ever avoided change because it's uncomfortable?
- Have you ever told yourself you are a jerk, an idiot or a loser?
- Do you ever tell yourself that you don't have the right stuff?
- Have you ever done something, knowing that it was going to fail
before you even started?
- Have you ever feared confronting another . . . and therefore didn't?
- Do you feel that you just don't have the skills to negotiate
successfully?
- Do you always think life should be fair?
- Has your ego ever gotten in your way?
If you answer yes to any of the above, welcome to the world of
self-sabotage. In Stop Stabbing Yourself in the Back--Zapping the Enemy
Within, Dr. Judith Briles identifies 21 ways you can
undermine--zap--yourself. Within each snare are suggested Solutions and
Keepers--the ahas of getting you back on track.
Self-sabotage impacts everyone at some time. It doesn't matter if you
are the most successful and confident person today. There are times-hours,
days, weeks, months, even years-when forces come together and create havoc
in your life. By recognizing your own traps and self-sabotaging
techniques, you can create the right antidote to counteract them. When you
do, you will become self-reliant and self-confident-the goal of this book.
Several ingredients and factors enable you to sabotage yourself. These
are inner snares--those old fashioned traps that lurk around the corner of
life. All are situations and conditions-nooses around your neck--that you
create, enforce or enable. At some time, you will encounter some or all of
them, feeling that your world may be caving in. Your encounter--no matter
how brief-distorts your normal, everyday range of perceptions. You end up
ambushing yourself. Not a very cool thing to do.
It does not mean you are going over the deep end; that all is lost; and
you are a total failure. Land mines don't always explode. Potholes don't
always get bigger. Recognizing that inner snares exist and that solutions
can be found means you have learned to deal with self-sabotaging issues.
Some will be issues that are more likely to be female (not confronting,
extreme feminists and being too personal); others more male (egomania and
avoiding spirituality). The bottom line is that you now have viable
solutions to everyday problems delivered in a realistic and common sense
approach. Self-sabotage will be zapped from your life.
